Hello Steve!!!...I'm a little nervous about writing this but I just have to get some kind of answer to this problem. Well there is this guy I have been knowing for about four years which at first I wanted to pursue an relationship with but because of the age difference and his relationship with my oldest brother I never said anything. He soon had became my "big brother" just as he was with my brother. But deep down I still wanted something with him... Okay now fast forward to October of last year... I had went out one day with some of my friends to a local party and he was there with some of his friends. Well after the party my friends were a little drunk and the designated driver was not a safe driver so I asked my "Brother" if I can ride with him...Of course he said yes but he had some of his friends with him. Usually after the parties everyone piles up at one place and this time it was the gas station(Don't Judge we country lol). We stopped and the other two guys got out. While in the car he told me he has been wanting me for years and wish we had the chance to be together and he just didn't know the perfect moment or time to let it be known considering he did not want to over step his boundaries with my brother...Now i was shocked to hear the news and I really thought he was running game but he got to pointing out things which led me to believe this guy really wants me. And u know deep down I was all for it but it didn't feel like the right thing to do considering he was off and on with his baby-momma. And for about 2 months prior to that night they have really been off which she is not accepting. He begged me to go back to his crib which I did. Nothing happened that night we just talked. I asked him to wait for "that" which he accepted with no problem. Now at the time I was also in a relationship which was not going so well. We swapped numbers and we had been texting and talking and hanging out secretlyevery chance we got. About a week after Valentines I was frustrated with my boyfriends lies and games and I needed some type of happiness so I went over to my ''brothers'' house. I knew what I was going over there for and it wasn't to talk. It happened. Yes I gave up the cookie. WILLINGLY and it was awesome...Something totally out of my character but I felt like I needed to do something out of the norm because of the relationship I was in. Not once before that did he ask me for some but just waited until I was ready. Now me and my ''brother" have been have been on the DL since the night of the party until now and have been messing around since February. its great like that...This is the problem... His baby-momma is a friend of the family...which to be honest my senior year in high school she was my coach and one of my mother's co-workers. Me and my family have known her for about 6 years. You see know one knew they were in any type of relationship until she became pregnant. That's when her crazy side came out. Now that they are really done with each other he want us to come out and let it be known we are together...I don't...I feel like it's not worth all the drama...And I have been around both of them when he has told her her he does not want to be with her...He just wants a relationship with his child. I have heard about the crazy things she has done to him and his belongings and even witnessed them. She even felt the need to just pour out her heart to me one day we all went out. She was telling me how she knows it is someone else in his life and she just wants him and he does not love her anymore and how he won;t have sex with her. She says He tells her things like he wants someone he can have through thick and thin and be able to have around when the money is gone and all of that. He wants someone who wants something out of life and goes after it instead of a woman that sits around with two kids not wanting to work and waiting one child-support check from one baby dad and just money from the other one. And all she does is smoke weed with her cousins and he just doesn't want that kind of life and how he is tired of arguing all the time about nothing. She went from being a positive role model to a hoodrat...literally...She quit her job and really everything he told her he doesn't want descries her. Honestly! This is not the Woman I knew. And it is not because she is going through anything but for the past 2 years that is how she has been...That is how she wants to "enjoy " life. She doesn't want to change. To sum all this Steve I just need to know what I need to do. He is a good man. But because of the relationship my family has with them both is it worth crossing the lines??? I mean we have both been wanting this for so long even before she came in the pic...Is it worth coming out now???
@LW..actually! After you've written, what is no problem, you've only created something in your head.you left out the current status of you and your boyfriend. Seems like you're totally confused about what you want and how to want you want. Your problem exist in the secretly have conceived and now want to keep secret. No one on this panel or anyone else can help you but the truth. You know how the woman that he's playing with, ACTS, and it's all over his relationship with her. Until you resolve this issue, there's absolutely nothing you can peacefully do. If you two come out with your relationship, YOU LOSE, period. She'll stalk both of you and a your family will probably balk at your a relationship. Your dark little secret will eventually surface and the music will get louder and louder. I suggest you break it off with him, until he gets a firm grip on his life and his baby mama. You walked into an ambush of giant proportions and now you will suffer either way. So cool down your relationship with Mr. Great Sex and break it off with yours boyfriend and start anew. This is an awesome task because, no one wants ago be honest in this whole scenario. When the truth is hidden and the lies prevail..nothing but MESS wins. So straighten out your messes before you go forward, if not..you're in for a long hard ride with your wonderful life LOL..you are a mess..make this day the best day of your life..VOLTAIRE..
Albany, GA - WMRZ 98.1 FM
If you ever find yourself being secretive about a relationship, then you already know that it is wrong. You wrote this long, detailed letter trying to justify your reason for sneaking around with your "brother". You are sneaking because you know that he is still kicking it with your ex-coach. You even wrote in this long letter that their pattern is an on again, off again relationship. It may not be a good relationship, but he continues to back to her and you know it. Also, when a man tells you that he is only with a woman until her money runs out, then you should run from him as fast as your legs can carry you. He is bad news. Sneaky encounters may start out good, but they normally end miserably.
Augusta, GA - WPRW-FM 107.7
Well you have to be happy and I think your family would understand where you coming from but for the baby momma its going to be drama cause she pour her heart to you. My things is do what make you happy.
Chicago, IL - WVAZ 102.7 FM
From your letter, you sound young or he's a least 15 years older than you. You are playing with fire and somebody is going to get burned. You said, he's your oldest brother's friend, his baby mama is your mother's co-worker and she's crazy, she's your coach and crazy or just lost her mind with age, a family friend who talked to you about her relationship with the fake brother, the fake brother has become more of a big brother over time, etc... That's a lot going on here. Hope are fire retardant because are playing with fire and things seems to leading a a big blow up in the making and you are dead in the middle. If it's lust, get your fix and move on. Once you come out, things surely won't be the same. Relationships were be severed all over the place. My advice, THINK BEFORE YOU LIGHT THE FUSE ON THIS KEG OF DYNAMITE or there she blows. A Straw Letter turned Maury Show or a good Jerry Springer episode.
Los Angeles, CA - KJLH 102.3 FM
Hi Steve and Shirley ,how are you guys,My name is Linda Hall Fulcher. You guys new me when I was Linda Hall. I use to follow you guys a lot lot when you were working for The Beat,and you were in Compton California. I am the girl that use to ware all the leopard clothes with leopard hats and jumpsuits that were leopard. I am also from Memphis, I told Shirley that a while back.Steve I want to congratulate you on the Star on the walk of Fame in Hollywood, also congratulate you on your new Talk show, Steve you really have come a long ways, I have been following you and the Angles since, September of 2000. What I am writing you for Steve, I have forever been wanting to Go to the Neighborhood Award, but haven't had the money to go, I was wondering if you could get me a ticket to go this year.I sure would appreciated it.I have been down for a while since I lost my son and grandson to cancer, maybe if I do something like going to The Neighborhood award, and enjoy myself maybe i could get up out of this depression. I can understand if you can't, but I sure would love to go.So I am thanking you in advance. Tell Shirley, Tommy and Karla I said hello, and laugh at you all every morning in LA. Steve when you was her in LA and working with the Beat, I sent you and engraved trophy, that said "The Hardest Working Talk Show Host In World Of Talk Show Host Show Business", do you still have that,or do you remember .From Linda Hall, I sent that, if you can remember. But anyway I still love you guys, but what ever you can do would be very much appreciated.Continue to be Blessed, and I also love you in all the celebrations of Gospel, it was great this year,every time I see the show ,it brings tears to my eyes, you are great on that show every year. So go and continue to be Blessed. Love all you guys, Thank You.
Los Angeles, CA - KJLH 102.3 FM
You may as well "come out" . When will some black women pride themselves on some morals instead of sleezing and skeezing?
Nashville, TN - WUBT 101.1 FM
I think that you should just leave it be. He may be a good man but he has a lot of baggage that you'll be dealing with. More drama than is needed. he should just nip it in the bud with his baby mama.
Ada Lee Watts
New Orleans, LA - WQUE 93.3 FM
This is more lowlife hot ghetto mess. I'm glad this is a weekend letter as Steve hates trying to decipher crazy. And why are babies always born into this mess. Now they will have stupid parents, and nine times out of ten, turn out the same way. That is why the cycle will continue. And this is why stupid people should not have kids.
New York, NY - WBLS 107.5 FM
Let him be the one to bring the news and not you. Let him tell the story the way a man does and keep your mouth shut. This way it will be made known that dating was his idea all along. And no one will be able to make up conflicting stories based on what you say and what he said. If he claims full responsibility for pursuing you he will protect that and you from being bashed. And he won't say more than what he thinks folks should know. His ex has confirmed that nothings happening between them two so she's expecting for him to expose someone new. She'll be shocked that it's you but in knowing men? He won't say for how long. And neither should you. So if he breaks the news he'll be gentle to all involved who may be affected to keep a cap on emotions. This is just a situation that I believe you should let the man handle and take charge of while you stay quiet. And let him take the backlash for it. If he's a real man he'll defend your honor to not allow anyone to confront you about it. Not without having to deal with him. And this is unfortunate for her but it's not like you're the reason they failed. It was doomed before you entered the picture.
San Francisco, CA - KBLX- 102.9 FM
That's a lot for one letter, all I can say "this is a hot ass mess" if you two are prepared an ready for the drama, that will unfold once y'all come out, then do it, but make sure y'all love is strong and ready for the backlash and drama. Please believe it will happen. Good luck...smdh
OMG THIS IS A LONG LETTER
Washington DC - WHUR 96.3 FM
It's too early in the morning for this silly HS stuff. You are a grown woman...probably, you could be 21 for all I know..especially when you have friends who get wasted including the designated driver. Moving on to this letter, I doubt she turned into a hoodrat and was probably a hood rat the entire time and he just didn't see it. Look, if you like him, make it public. But, do you really want to be caught up in that drama? Tell him he needs to put his foot down with the hoodrat. And why is she opening up to you about him? this is just to RATCHET
Ms. S. Billingsley Moore
Washington DC - WHUR 96.3 FM
Have you ever heard of the word brevity : ) Anyways, no true relationship is built upon lies. If you and this gentleman would like to be with one another, and you feel you can enhance one another's lives, then by all means, out with the secrecy.
No baby mama is a bit tougher than the people she has to deal with. So as long as the two of you are prepared to keep her in check, she'll get the message. And again, if this relationship will be built on trust, openness, and honesty, I see no reason for you two to continuously live in secrecy before your families, friends, and associates. Keep it real!